Once upon a time, on a day too dark and chilly for sunbathing, my sister PK and I sat in my living room in St. Pete, telling stories about odd apartment neighbors.
PK lives next door to a guy who used to keep his kid’s hamster in a cage outside his apartment, presumably because tenants aren’t allowed to have pets.
One day the hamster just disappeared. Gone. Cage and all.
Inspired by the number of missing dog signs in my neighborhood, PK and I designed a hypothetical missing hamster sign.
Male teddy bear hamster
Age: 2 1/2
Has small ears, tiny eyes and strawberry blonde fur
Has black fleck on front right paw
Last seen on wheel
And yes, we printed out a dozen copies and tacked them to telephone poles around my neighborhood.
Please don’t chastise me. I’m a sucker for missing animals. Remember Pooh Bear?
Lighten up and do something funny for the helluvit. It’s April Fool’s Day – nine days before my birthday! For hoax-y inspiration, click here.