A Very Long Engagement by Sébastien JaprisotYeah, so about that Christmas present Joe spent two hours preparing… He made me a third series of his highly sought-after Bank of Joe notes. The Series I notes, constructed last Christmas using Sharpie markers and index cards, were such a runaway success that Joe opted to issue a special massage-only run this summer as [...]
The man with no hair who you see in the freeze frame of this YouTube video is my sister Heelya’s boyfriend Brian. He buzzed his head last week. He says it’s his new Chris Daughtry look. Joe filmed this little segment, among others, on Christmas day as we milled about our house cooking dinner and [...]
It’s 1:30 a.m. Christmas morning and my husband has been holed up in my office for an hour evidently wrapping an enormous and particularly vexing present for me. What on earth is he wrapping? The one thing I want, I already have. It’s our first Christmas together (I always spend it in Buffalo) and my [...]
Peggy’s cobalt blue dishes won’t leave me, which is odd because I don’t know Peggy and I never ate off her dishes. She died years ago in the house next door, according to an old lady who lives on the alley near 30th Avenue and 1st Street. One night while Joe and I were walking [...]
Last week I received a note from Nana on Hallmark stationary, which was quite aristocratic given my grandmother’s weakness for toilet paper and bark. But before I share with you Nana’s latest correspondence, I should point out that when Joe and I climbed Whiteface Mountain on our honeymoon in September, we had no idea that [...]
In honor of your turning the big OH-FIVE, here are 13 characters to whom you’ve been compared. But before you scroll on, know this dear pug: no matter your doppelgangers, I will always love you for who you are, you sweet, loving, sausage-shaped ball of joy. You are the perfect companion and a credit to [...]
About four months ago, maybe longer, Joe ran to CVS for some odds and ends. I didn’t go because I had a headache, which I believe was the primary reason for the late-night CVS run. We were out of Advil. As Joe grabbed his keys and headed for the door, he asked me if I [...]
UPDATE ON MY PREVIOUS POST: My mother made $185 this weekend by re-purposing my wedding centerpieces into holiday decorations. Here she is manning her stand at the end of the driveway: One man pulled over yesterday morning in full hunting regalia, begging my mother to hold three centerpieces for him. He was a one-armed hunter, [...]
Here’s a photo of one of the table centerpieces at my wedding. My mom made 14 of these suckers for the tables inside Holimont Ski Lodge. She’s craftier than Martha Stewart and way less snide. The concept was loosely inspired by my wedding crown. And the Ikea lanterns I have hanging on my back porch.
I wrote this the day I returned from my honeymoon and never posted it. It’s for you romantics. … It was important to Joe that we go on our honeymoon the day after our wedding. One momentous thing followed by another momentous thing. Wedding then honeymoon. No lag time between. He called it “getting shot [...]
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