I’m writing this in response to emails I’ve received from first-time expectant mothers.
How to avoid becoming Pregzilla:
10 tips to help you keep your wits during nine months of beautiful freakishness.*
1. Don’t stuff your face the second you see a plus sign.
I get it. You’re pregnant. You’ve been granted a one-way ticket to weight-gainsville, so why wouldn’t you overindulge? After all, everyone around you keeps telling you that you’re eating for two — even women who’ve had children. You have the world’s blessing to pig out. At no other point in your life will people smile at you cutely as you order two double cheeseburgers and a bucket of french fries. Oh, she’s pregnant. Look at the pregnant woman eat. If I had a quarter pounder for every time someone told me that I should “take advantage” of being pregnant, I’d look like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man. Seriously. For your well-being and your baby’s well-being, eat smart. That doesn’t mean you should sweat every pound. (See Pregnancy Confession No. 7.) Nor does it mean you should deny yourself every milkshake. (See my obsession with Reese’s Cups.) It just means you’ll likely feel better, look better and be happier if you at least AIM for the recommended 35-pound weight gain. BTW: The average preggo needs an extra 300 calories a day. That’s one Hershey’s bar. My advice for newly knocked-up mamas: eat small healthy meals and/or snacks all day. And by snacks I mean, fruits, vegetables, crackers, cheese, whole wheat toast and cereal. My favorite staple: peanut butter. The sooner you cut out junk food and processed crap, the sooner your body stops craving it. It’s easy to forget that every morsel of food you ingest travels down a pipeline that runs straight into your baby’s stomach. That’s a lot of f#@%ing responsibility. But so is motherhood, so get used to it. Look at being pregnant as going on a nine-month health food kick. Take “advantage” of it in that way.
TRY keeping frozen fruit bars in your freezer. They combat nausea, chocolate cravings and they’re low-cal.